Busted :-(

So last night I'm on my way to work. I'm not running late for a change but I'm cruising down the expressway anyway. Okay, really cruising, like easily 80 mph cruising. I confess, I am a closet speed demon. I love to drive fast. I'm comfortable at 80 mph, doesn't even feel like I'm going that fast.

When I have the kids or the fur kids in the car I drive at the speed limit. If I creep up above it Baseball Boy feels free to inform me of the violation.

So I'm rounding a curve and there it is, cleverly hidden, a State Police cruiser and I'm staring down the barrel of a radar gun. I glance down at the speedometer but it's just habit, I know I'm well over the limit. Reflex causes me to hit the brakes but really what's the point, I'm past the point of no return. I watch in my rear view mirror as I round another curve and I see the car start to pull out, damn.

I slow down to 70 mph, can't be a hypocrite and actually go to the speed limit can I? I see him off in the distance he's behind a bunch of traffic. He flips his lights on and they scatter like mice. There's no one between the pack and me. I move over to the right lane in anticipation, he comes up behind me and flashes his lights a few times. I pull right over.

My habit has gotten me pulled over a few times in my life. It's been a while though, so long in fact this is the first time since I've added new magnets to the back of my van. Magnets like "I Love My Pit Bull", "Ask Me About Pit Bulls" and my favorite, "When it comes to Pit Bulls the Beast is often at the other end of the leash". Maybe my magnets are making him nervous because it's sure taking him a long time to get out of his car. I see him back there on the radio, I'm sure his dispatcher has a full description of my vehicle and is checking my information for any sort of nefarious deed. He finally gets out of his car and walks very cautiously to the back and looks in then I see him release his gun from the holster and his hand is firmly attached to the grip. I can see his face clearly and he is uptight, jeez am I wanted for something I don't know about. But I'm saddened and slightly amused to know that it's probably because of my magnets that he is so cautious. Hey, I'd rather have cops safe than sorry so I'm not offended in any way. So he finally works his way up to just before my window, he leans forward and glances in the van. I smile and hit the button to roll down my window, I'm careful to put my hands back on the steering wheel. As soon as the window is down I say, "Don't worry about the pit bulls, they're just my pets and they're home, probably sleeping on the couch." His face visibly relaxes. I'm not sure if it's because there are no dogs in the car or because he's face to face with a pudgy, middle aged, suburban house wife. I offer him my license, registration and insurance card and tell him I know I was speeding. He asks me where I'm going. I tell him work and he tells me to have a nice night and be careful. I tell him the same and he walks back to his car. I drive away and before I know it I'm back up to 80 mph. I should be ashamed of myself, but I'm not.